It was miserable weather up in the hills today. Conditions were humid, rainy and chilly/hot in a way that only seems to happen around Taipei. As a result of the extremely slippery conditions, Mark and I opted to take a different route. We came across a derelict police firing range, and I obviously had to stop to take some photos … it’s been disused for some time, but you can still see its unique ‘patina’ of use, AKA bullet holes. Not completely convinced it is a safe set-up for firing projectiles!
Tag: Taiwan
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Taipei Flora Expo Preparation
Even though China got the Olympics, I have to respect the effort that Taiwan put in to host the Deaflympics and World Games; no easy feat. However, the fact that Shanghai is hosting the World Expo does not justify to me why Taiwan has to have its own tit-for-tat Exposition, in the form of the Taipei International Flora Exposition; an event I am not even sure has existed before.
Construction is taking place at great pace across the city, making me question how serious they are about the themes of sustainability and eco-friendliness, let-alone the amount of aviation fuel they expect will be burnt if the six million expected visitors to make the trip successfully. I am already tired of the event mascots, and am irritated that they opted to fill in perfectly good parkland when it would have been far more progressive to take over an area of brown-field industries that could kick-off urban renewal.
Take a look at the web sites and tell me I am not being cynical. Enjoy the mind-bending animation and music!
- Taipei International Flora Expo – main site.
- Taipei International Flora Expo – mildly less painful site
- 3D Movie!!!
Looks like they are making some permanent extensions to the Fina Arts Museum too…
That’s a wrap!
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Adaptable Architecture
Taipei tries its best at erecting buildings that have some semblance of style, even if that style is generating a neo-Gothic Greek Revivalist Bali retreat. But bless ’em, the local residents get to work modifying, adapting and extending their properties with scant regard for the outward appearance of a building. It’s something I have written about before (Open-Source Architecture), but not seen built with that thought in mind at the outset.
I was therefore rather pleased to be walking along Minsheng E Rd. yesterday, and happen across a housing development that at least seems to respect peoples’ wishes to augment their original purchase. In a manner not too far removed from the iconic Barbican in London, geometric flourishes break up the surfaces of the structure, allowing some degree of freedom in treatment of windows, air-conditioning and sideways extensions. It’s modern, certainly Asian, and I rather like it.
From an alternative angle.
Eric from ADC marvels at the trees, individually marked with species markers.
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Tips for Creating a Successful Chat Roulette Party
Chat Roulette is the latest darling of the internet community. Connecting you, via webcam, with random users from around the world, it takes all that is miserable, squalid and immoral debauched about the internet, and conveniently gathers them in one place. At the slightest hesitation or lull in conversation you or they have the power to ‘next’ them into oblivion, never to be seen again. Naturally, I had to get this projected on the wall and invite a bunch of people round to celebrate my birthday.
You don’t need an economics degree to guess what type of users we encountered most frequently. The original idea was to get everyone downing a shot each time they saw a guy’s junk, but we would have ended up completely hammered in 15 minutes. What we did do, was settle on a system of serve, volley, smash that had myself and most of the party howling with such belly-aching laughter that the police arrived to break us up. It only seems fair to share our process:
1. Combine Webcam and Lamp into a ‘Weblamp’
We set up the web cam attached to my desk lamp, so the spotlight, quite literally, was on you while filming was taking place; is there a product idea in there? This gave everything the element of theatre, as the spotlight swung around the room in search of its next victim.
2. Get any guys away from the webcam
Sorry fellas; when the camera was on us, we would get ‘nexted’ within fractions of a second. Since most of Chatroulette is frequented by guys in their underpants, this comes as little surprise. Get rid of the guys from the initial view.
3. Recruit some girls; preferably dressed as nurses

In the invite, I asked everyone to wear something silly, or bring some sort of disguise. Georg’s girlfriend, Sharo, dived in feet first, and came dressed as a nurse, and simply ruled the party. As soon as we shifted focus onto these guys, the retention rate of users went sky high, and we instead could begin the hunt for some unsuspecting prey.4. Delegate typing to a third-party.
The second element in our armoury was Armando, who first crafted coquettish, flirtatious come-ons for the guys on the other end of the tube. Lulled into a false sense of security, they must have thought they had found Chatroulette utopia … but this all ended abruptly when Armando begin unleashing vitriolic Chinglish slurs in their direction; “show me your eyeballs gothy man!”
5. When ready, unleash a German with a fake willy.
Georg delivered the fatal blow, time after time, jumping onto screen with a hideous fake willy attached to the front of his apron. Playing the role perfectly, the room repeatedly erupted in laughter and screams, as the faces of the victims either dropped in disgust, or split with their own laughter.
6. Let the room say ‘hello!’
If the person was game and stuck around, this was a perfect moment to invite the rest of the room to say hello. We got some appreciative thumbs up, waves, and then sent them on their way with a deftly timed ‘next!’
It was certainly an unusual party, and one that I am pretty sure we will not be repeating (!). At least while the paint was fresh on the website, it was dead good fun to get involved. It was interesting to see how much it felt like being on the internet in the early days again, what with the clandestine chats, poor connection and frequent crashes. Gotta say – thanks to Georg and the girls for being such good sports, and Abe and Armando for going to all the trouble of printing life-size photos of me, with three different lengths of moustache, no less.
Some more photos of the chaos:
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Kenting 2010
Kenting – summed up in a single photo!
Though the departure was a little more hectic than I was originally envisioning, it was my pleasure to jump on the HSR down south and join Michael and Tanja for a weekend of summer sun in Kenting – south Taiwan.
The guys had come through to attend a wedding, and as such were accompanied by a group of 20 German holidaymakers – and all on the same weekend as the largest music festival in Taiwan; Spring Scream. As a result of poor planning on my part, I was actually supposed to be staying some fifteen kilometers away in Hengchun, but M&T offered me their spare bed in the amazing, but less than charismatically-named, Kenting Youth Activity Center. I love that place.
Situated on a peninsular east of the main drag, it is – according to their website – a ‘traditional Fujen(a province in southern China, also called Min) style building with red gate, white wall and red tile roof, and is often reputed as the Museum of Southern Min Style Architecture.’ I wish they gave more of the history, with a bit more explanation of the layout, but no matter; I would probably discover it is made of concrete.
Square clouds … I could just soak this in all day!
Detail view.
Shots of night of the wonderful lanterns, lighting up the courtyard.
Tiles done properly. Almost.
Doors.
The local walk down to the rocky peninsular.
Cable management.
Silhouettes.
Details, bathed in warm morning light.
Birds of a feather.
Little Georg makes a run for it.
Of course, we didn’t have the place entirely to ourselves. As host weekend of the largest music festival in Taiwan, there were some pretty odd sights, and a funny mixture of people. Beginning with obligatory trips down to the local nightmarket (copy and pasted from Taipei?), we then began sinking drinks, seeing some of the outlying stages, and finally ending up on the beach for what was a very nice, chilled out session the last time I was here. Nope – not this time… a huge, thumping sound system, massive crowd and despite signs urging restraint, a barrage of fireworks arcing up into the sky (as well as other places). I must at this moment apologise to all the people with car alarms that we set off, when some enterprising vendor sold us a box of mortars, at 4:30 in the morning. Only in Kenting.
Beer emergency.
Walking the dog.
Little Georg checking the icecreams – it was fun playing with them, though I wished my German had not corroded so far!
Peugeot 106 … waffles.
It was quite a culture shock to land from Texas, and dive head-first into full intensity Taiwan during ‘Spring Break’, all the while accompanied by German family members! Absolutely fantastic to see the Helds on top form though. See you guys again soon!
Taiwanese cowboys – summing up my cultural transition?
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Easter Brunch
This is proving to be one of those ‘intense weekends’. Arrive from the USA at midnight on Friday, get up to help prepare Easter Brunch for a dozen friends (Rabbit, Lamb and Quiche, no less!), then jump on a train down south to meet Michael and Tanja in Kenting; and all with a rainy cloud of jetlag hovering over me: I wish I could have spaced it out a bit.
Abe and Armando – I owe you one.
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Hongmonay
Mince Pies, mid-process.
I had, in my thirty years, never been away from my village for Christmas, bar trips to family around the country. As adorable as that is, it was high time I flew the nest during the festive period.
Thoughtfully, my sister agreed with this and timed delivery of a new addition to the family to coincide approximately with Chinese New Year. As a result, I instead decided to fly back for a visit in early February, leaving Christmas ominously without family. Eeek!
There seem to be two distinct types of forriner in Taiwan; those that refuse to put any effort into celebration, and as a result sit around in a haze of depression as the Taiwanese population continues about their daily business; and those that band together to meet, cook, eat, drink and proclaim proudly how very jolly their Christmas was. I decided to jump two-feet-first into the second camp, and I am fortunate enough to have friends and flatmates that felt the same way.
Rather than settle for your common-or-garden set of meals, we opted to go completely overboard, inviting about a dozen friends over for a Christmas Eve meal. This was to be followed up with an invite to even more friends for an evening ‘Desert Party’, no doubt washed down with some booze and Christmas cheer. And we hadn’t even got to planning Christmas Day yet.
Planning, prep and purchasing for this set of events began about a week prior to the date. Served up with fresh Christmas decorations, a sober realisation dawned that this was not going to be as straightforward as we expected. Number one, single-handedly ferrying the food around Taipei is not easy; even with taxis. Second, while with some effort it was clear we were going to be able to get hold of American-style delicacies and comestibles, hunting down British ingredients was sadly not going to be a ‘cake-walk’.
Exhibit-A: Mince Pies. No, they do not contain meat. Yes, apparently they used to. In the UK, complete packs of pies are sold, or the ‘mince’ is sold in jars for assembly in your own kitchen, and has been allowed to mature for a decent period of tim prior to sale. Try as I might, I could not find either; thus a resort to mince pie manufacture from ‘first principles’. This involved sourcing my own beef fat in place of suet (note to self; do not ever use a food processor to cut up beef fat – pink goo is not a pretty sight!), currents and sultanas. I decided to substitute in some cranberries and chopped-up figs, add plenty of booze and allow just under a week for maturing and soaking. While the pastry was a little hard on day one, I would proclaim these a success!

Photo taken with my iPhone and the Tiltshift app … quite a fun way to get creative.Exhibit-B: Brussel Sprouts. This perennial favourite, and source of greenhouse gasses, is clearly not on the menu of the average Taipei resident. Understandable, perhaps, but a bit disappointing. Luckily, teams of British people were scouring the city, and tracked down a tray of the little gas-bombs in one of the hotel delicatessens – absurdly expensive, completely overcooked, but just the thing to add a splash of colour to the table.
Exhibit-C: Meat. I can proudly claim that I have never once had turkey on Christmas day; our family instead tends to go for a more traditional range of birds, such as duck or goose. This was clearly not going to fly with the American contingent, so we decided that while the larger Christmas Eve event should feature turkey and a shoulder of lamb, the Christmas Day meal was centred around a pair of ducks (still sporting heads and feet, as I discovered to my mild horror). Turkey was marinaded in beer, chilli and garlic for several days and was as good as I have ever had, lamb was not half bad and a world better than our previous attempt; and the ducks were juicy and flavourful, just lacking a little in the way of crispy skin that is so loved by everyone.
Exhibit-D: Suedes, Turnips and Parsnips. Nada. No way. Couldn’t find ’em. A shame, but we subbed-in some great mashed pumpkin. Tensions were also raised over the method of roasting potatoes … of course you peel them! Get that duck fat in there! … I have a feeling no matter what we did, without Maris Pipers or King Edward potatoes, nothing was going to work very well. Never the less, very enjoyable, and a nice project for me the next time we have a big meal.
A small package also arrived from my mother in the weeks approaching Christmas. Christmas cake(nobody ever eats it anyway, so the bite-size portion was perfect), Christmas pudding (okay, I admit she sent it one year previously! But it keeps, right?), various nuts and a pack of decorations. Add to this the 3Kg bag of almonds from Tasha for our family tradition of toasted nuts, and iTunes access to a completely overpriced ‘Nine Lessons in Carols’ from the King College Chapel Choir, and we were set.

Christmas Eve. 4pm. Our family members over the globe tune in to Radio 4’s broadcast of Nine Lessons in Carols, and take a moment to think of each other. Our tradition of roasting almonds is one of my favourite aspects of Christmas, and I believe it comes from my Mother’s expat roots in Spain.Two full days of preparation and effort from all of us paid off handsomely. We had a splendid meal with some great friends, and a lovely time meeting some new people at the desert party. Indeed, I felt I did my bit when I sent off a British Graphic Artist resident in Taipei with a pack of Mince Pies and cakes for a day when he had to work. A very satisfying Merry Christmas indeed.

Heroic efforts from the guys made for a great time. Effort in = rewards out x 2.

Armando does his bit.

Devoured in seconds, each Christmas Pie took me a total of about fifteen minutes to make … all worth it!

Checking progress …


Mmmm.
Dawn preps the stuffing.
Food porn.
Resource-allocation of ovens and hobs drew ridicule … but it worked!
Birds of a feather.
People arrive for the desert party.
Chefs and cheffetes.
Abe and Tasha, sitzing in a tree!






Party photos. We were treated to three splendid bottles of high quality scotch Whisky; Highland Park from Orkney and both Bruichladdich (pronounced ‘Brook Laddie) Bowmore from Islay. Noel had given up drinking a few years ago, and we certainly offered a good home to them!
Uncle Ken asleep on the couch for most of the party.
A slightly more austere, but no less enjoyable, Christmas day.NYE in HK
Phase 2 of the festive for me usually involves meeting up with good friends, and putting a fair amount of effort into traveling somewhere to celebrate it in some style. This year was no different, but for the first time in about half a decade (maybe more?) I did not reunite with Phil for the bells. Perhaps next year!
Instead, a weekend invasion of Hong Kong was planned. This gave me the chance to meet up once again with Michael and Tanja (and new addition to the house, Moc Moc), and see Sam in his new natural environment. With more than a little pressure, I also persuaded Sam to finally complete construction of his new mountain bike, and thus the plans were set for a great weekend of wining, dining, hiking and biking in Hong Kong.

The ubiquitous red plastic ‘lanterns’ found floating above Hong Kong’s market stalls.
Raindrops keep falling on my head.

Cracking up!
Darkness & Light.
Hard at work.
Tramlines.
Love Handles.
Stolen moments.
Gates Foundation.
Goes like a Singer.
Flying in formation.
Broom broom.I have always been quite a fan of Hong Kong, as you may have guessed. It’s little nods to the UK, combination of high-density quasi-chaos, international atmosphere, and easy access to nature has always been a draw, and each trip I take there sees me finding a different angle through which to appreciate it. This time, I was armed with mountain bike and charged with a mission to enjoy a good new year.
And so I did. After a clumsy session of assembling my bike on the balcony while catching up with Michael over a beer, the first port-of-call was to meet with Sam at the Bloomberg offices in Central. Michael, Tanja and I spent a happy hour wandering around the studios, prodding Sam with questions about the interior design, software systems, HR policy and protocols for filming a TV show that is beamed across the world. The level of care poured into every aspect of the business was an inspiration, and left us jealous / inspired for the return to our respective offices the following Monday.
A happy day spent wandering the lanes of HK island, and a quick visit to Michael’s friend of
f=”http://www.voidwatches.com/”>Void watches fame (yes I did buy one, in white) meant we were well prepared for a feeding session to see in the bells later on that evening. Hosted by a new open ‘creative space’ initiative, we were surrounded by an interesting array of people, spanning fashion design, product and print – indeed the girl running her own printing business claimed to be heading to the North Pole in the new year, greatly impressing Michael and myself, and encouraging us to resolve to do something equally adventurous (and preposterous-sounding) at the earliest opportunity. Champagne flowed, and we saw in the new year drinking our way through the remnants of the bottles on the street.
Candlelight.
Streetlife.
Loitering.
Towering above Hong Kong.
The Late Show.The first day of 2010 saw a change of pace, and a mildly hazy hike up into the hills surrounding Taimo Mountain. A truckload of monkeys, an inspection of WWII fortifications and a mutual fondling of each others’ cameras and it was back to HK island to meet one of Michael’s ex-colleagues from ideo Shanghai. Great food, German beer served out of porcelain bowls, and another desert session in the street; not a bad beginning of the end for 2009.

Monkeying around.
View back towards the city.
Amusing icons.
WWII fortifications.
Colour combinations on storm covers.With hours to spare, Sam got his wheels laced up, and we met at the Lamma Island ferry terminal to jump into buses for the run up to Taimo Mountain – not quite the most efficient route, but it worked. We joined Hector (Head Chef of the Marriot Hotel, no less) and the guys from the Hong Kong Mountain Bike Association for a day in the hills. Michael risked it with his old wheels from Taiwan, and we set off into the clouds. It’s no surprise that the trails were highly reminiscent of Taiwan, but still the first kilometre or so had us all sliding around in extremely slippery conditions. The trails did open up as we approached the summit, however, and we were treated to a fantastic descent down a ridge, hugging the contours – truly memorable. The rest of the ride was a decent mixed bag of trails and conditions, and I came away rather taken with the riding in Hong Kong. I aim to be back!

Waiting for the bus.
Awesome trails.
Team HK.
Preparing to jump.
Landing zone.
New bike. New bike.
Quite jealous … my wallet starts quivering!Packing the bike up was marginally more straightforward than the arrival leg, but it was still amusing to squeeze the hilariously over-sized case into the taxi. Cathay Pacific really delivered the goods (literally), allowing me to use my 30kg weight limit to full effect in both directions with no extra charges. When I get my road bike sorted, I aim to see where else I can head to in the Asia region.
Happy New Decade!

…. and back to Taiwan!

















































